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To paraphrase Thomas Harris, the words "crazy" and "evil" nowhere appeared.

But on Friday I shall receive the karma of my own pretention when I sit on a panel at a local symposium, the third of three speakers, where one and two shall have actual PowerPoint presentations on what otaku are. The fact that I am an otaku, for some reason, makes me very uncomfortable going around classifying and measuring them. It would make me sound, after all, as if I was certain who they are.

Is Patrick Harlan as mind-blowing in real life?? How do even talk to such a talented performer, who could objectively be a major star anywhere in the world!? A lot of people think he's the next Dave Spector, but they're wrong: he's the next Cary Grant.

No, Carl is the next Cary Grant.

That Star Blazers movie will never get made. the 'gentleman' pimping it is an ass. I say this without fear.

All these years, all this shame that yes, I AM otaku, possibly even in the actual Japanese sense, I've never felt the urge to kill someone, cut them up and eat them.

Not even once.

Could be because I never got into quasi-porn garage kits and gashapon figures of various anime girls. All I have is Space Ghost interviewing Capt. Kirk and Hellboy. Somehow this has great meaning to me.

Aside: Patrick, did you ever get my email confirming the OK to quote for the book? did it arrive in time? I never heard back, so...I mean, ya know, no biggie if you did or didn't use it and crap, I just feel bad if I blew the deadline because of iffy email on my end.

Steve, you made the cut. Thanks for the email, which arrived in time.

I didn't mean to suggest that anime and manga leds to people being killed. I guess I was being vauge out how it appeals to people who have a serious need for fantasy.

Tomo says I have no future in Japan as a talent since Pakun has already hogged the spot for "Patrick."

Enter, Pedro Edogawa.

Well, these things do happen--they happened to me, except I was the one who might have been killed along that otaku road. Ironically, the motive for the armed robbery was the same as Kevin Ray Underwood's ambition--to steal stock in order to set up a store where they sell Manga, and Anime, and toys and stuff from Japan. O-T-A-K-U in the U-S-A, as John Cougar would say.

I couldn't help but think of Miyazaki the otaku killer when I read about Kevin Ray Underwood. Miyazaki's also the reason why I don't like the branding of OTAKU. I don't understand why people would want to be associated with the Tsutomu Miyazaki's and Kevin Ray Underwoods of the world. And I wouldn't associate friends like Steve Harrison with the likes of these freaks, either.

Yeah, OTAKU is a bad word in my book. Yeah, these are people who have a serious need for fantasy, as you put it. They wear their fantasies, they watch their fantasies, they eat, sleep and shit their fantasies. OTAKU means people who need to pull their heads out of their asses.

On that note, when I do go on that killing spree I'll make sure to mention Sonny Chiba and Nick Adams and your new book.

Good to know that you eventually saw what I was seeing with the Underwood story, Patrick. When I first sent it to you along with the Tsutomu Miyazaki-level similarities that I felt the media had completely glossed over, you seemed pretty hesitant to agree for the first hour or however long that conversation was until I sent you his "let's all learn Japanese together" blog.

Now it's being printed in your book for Japanese people to see. The dark secret goals of this podcasting gig are being fulfilled on scales I'd never considered.

For the record, my killing spree will be a Golan/Globus production.

Daryl, will your spree include LOTS OF GUNS, LOTS OF SHOOTING, LOTS OF ROBOTS? Don't worry, just DO IT just DO IT!

Daryl can't, Carl...you have to have two first names that are used constantly, cf. Lee Harvey Oswald.

The Ameritaku was but a heartbeat from becoming a serial killer.

I'm glad nobody refers to me as Steven Richard.

Oh, wait....

I figured the American equivalent of Tsutomu Miyazaki was bound to strike someday. I just didn't know it would be this soon.

The final nail in the coffin of my years long otakudom has been hammered in.

That said, the movie V For Vendetta has given me the occasional urge to blow up several political institutions I dislike while wearing a Guy Fawkes mask. It has nothing to do with anime, but it still kind of worries me.

Carl, at first I was concerned that my killing spree would have too many girls and a bit of a downer ending, so I prayed to my idol gods for a new one. Alas, every grunt, every groan, every eyeblink was accompanied by some noxious sound of Gigi, so I spent 48-72 hours blowing up 16mm footage of Pluto's murder scenes from the "Mightiest Robot on Earth" episodes of Astro Boy to 35mm, splicing that into my ballad of carnage, and then acting out the entire thing in lieu of an audio track. Now dees, dees iz CANNON FILM!

I'd almost forgotten until Alt-san showed me a bootleg. Robotech: The Movie begins with a Cannon films logo...

I promise that as I film my orgy of destruction, I will not use music from 'Pirates of the Caribbean' or 'Gladiator'.

Using a cut from Our Man Flint would be so cliche.

All kidding aside, I fear this is the start of the 'Blame anime and manga' cycle, just as D & D was the root of all evil back in the '80s.

I greatly fear what might happen at one of the summer cons. Too many chicks in skimpy cosplay projecting things/ideas/subcontext they really don't understand, combined with too many male children with no sense of self control or propriety.

And both thinking that actions just don't have any consequences.

Man, is that gloomy or what? sorry.

Well, the mainstream media ignored the whole anime-manga connection, so I think we're all safe. What really made him do it was BLOGGING.



Wait...then that means..we all..

Patrick, you may have known, but Daryl and I were passing forth lines from Carl Macek's personal account of the making (or more strictly speaking, splicing) of ROBOTECH: THE MOVIE. It beats most director's commentary tracks all hollow.

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