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ATTENTION PARENTS: I *DARE* you to shave skull-and-crossbones into your toddler's hair. I DOUBLE DARE you.

Never mind the odd dental work, that momma still sizzles.

Makeup and clothes can go a long way. I love how the pics at the bottom look like something they'd use to advertise japanprobe.worldfriends.tv. Free child-sized sunglasses for anyone thinking "MILFs".

I love the bottom chronology; so typical of the typical sexy gyaru's early-twenties timeline:

2004: Partied a lot, had some experimental liaisons with foreigners, worked at some inane job that I got because I'm hot.

2006: Fell in love with some unremarkable J-guy named Daisuke. Started dating.

2007: Got pregnant. Will either marry Daisuke (at which point he'll immediately start seeking out a mistress if he has the money to), or will become a single gyaru-mama and resume pre-Daisuke life.

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